Heavy-hearted

Do you ever find yourself feeling heavy-hearted? It most often strikes me when something is not what it should be...is not what it could have been. When I learn of something tragic in someone else's life that came about as a result of poor choices, it weighs on me.

Often, I begin mulling over what has happened in the life of another and I can't help but think, maybe if I'd paid more attention, maybe if I'd reached out more than I did...maybe I would have broken through, maybe if I'd seen what was happening...I could have helped...it didn't have to end up this way. I wonder: Is there anything left for me to do now? I wish I'd known earlier...I wish I'd seen it coming.

Though it must be miserable to sift through the wreckage of your own life, it's very hard to watch from the outside as well. We, as Christians, live in community with one another. What hurts others should hurt us as well. I admit though, I hate the helplessness of it. Wanting a situation redeemed by the power of God, willing to be a part of the process in some small way, but feeling helpless to make a difference. 

If only I had known sooner...maybe then...

The what ifs are so hard. At these times, all I can do is pray. Pray that God will give me an opportunity. An opportunity to make a difference in the aftermath. An opportunity to be an encouragement, a friend and a listening ear. Someone who can provide support, truth, loving-kindness and help.

I'm so very thankful we have a God who cares; One who is there for us. It is comforting to know He can make a way and if He doesn't, He will still be there for the child who needs it.